Dear Vincent,
Once again, I require approvals.
I know what a burden I must be to you, but who else can I turn to?
The city has requested “one final revision” for the twelfth time.
I am now working exclusively with instinct and a half-eaten croissant, improvising as I go, and the results are bold.
The budget has been declared a work of fiction.
have replaced the engineering team with a dog that seems very confident.
The public engagement session was held in a mirror maze, so every attendee was technically counted multiple times.
I presented the new pedestrian flow analysis using interpretive dance.
It was described as “inspired but lacking a data-driven approach.”
The committee has requested an impact study on the impact of our impact study.
I am now designing a smaller version of the project, inside the project, so people can experience the project before the project is built.
They asked if the miniature version will also require an environmental review.
God! I have no money left for consultants.
Today I had to replace the traffic engineer with a man who was simply standing outside.
He looked at the site, squinted, and said, “Yeah, could get busy.”
The board is now demanding a second opinion.
Send whatever you can.
Yours, Theo
